May 21, 2010

Stage-fright

Everyone has been faced with stage-fright at some point or the other in their lives. It maybe something as simple as giving a presentation in front of your peers or something as life-changing as getting married. And very few people are very sure about the consequences. For instance, typically just before any presentation, my legs temporarily lose all feeling and my fingers are icy to touch. I have instant misgivings about the whole concept. At that instant, everything seems to be like a bad idea. It was a bad idea to recommend those changes to the experiment that brought about those new results... a bad idea to accept that it was you indeed who had to give the talk in front of everyone... bad idea to work against the close deadline and even worse idea to actually complete the job in the allotted time. But you know what? When I walk there to face everyone, if not instantly, slowly but surely the warmth spreads to my extremes - my fingertips and my toes. My initially high-pitched voice regains it's natural timbre and my poise and confidence increase exponentially as I make eye contact and start to explain. After all, it is my topic and my choice and I know it best. That reassurance carries me along quite well till the very end and all feelings of misgivings vanish. 

And no matter what the occasion, with every big event, come the nerves and the momentary self-doubt. And I have come to realize that very few people don't have the initial nerves... that split-second of second guessing the choices made. And of course I am not talking just about "presentations" here. Anything big... getting married, buying a house, etc. As soon as you add the "this is it" clause to it, it assumes paramount importance. And it's all in good humor too. According to me, if you didn't have those nerves, it wasn't as important to you. And if you're making a grand decision in your life, you might as well be as sure as you can be. Before you take the plunge and do the best that you can for the decision you entailed. Fair enough.

4 comments:

Balaji P G said...

Not always.... Personally for me giving presentation is the most easiest part. It comes with experience though. With the increase in the size of the group usually my enthusiasm keeps growing. So i think it is more of personal level of comfort for certain aspects. Some are comfortable talking, some with writing.

Jaya said...

Balaji-> The presentation was just a pretext example for the bigger things I've indicated on the post. And just to be clear, the symptoms I feel before a presentation are felt just by me... while everyone else sees only the "supremely confident exterior" and invariably good talk at the end of the day. Being in a research field where I seem to be giving presentations on a weekly basis, I cannot afford to let anything hamper my own confidence. I am glad to know you have none of that though. But do you feel the fireflies of doubt when you "sign up" for a really big thing? That's all I meant. :) Thanks for commenting and visiting :D

Madhumathi said...

Right now...am feeling those jitters...V r looking to purchase a decent 2BHK in Bangalore...Now thts a tough one lady, considering the whole aspects of it :)

Jaya said...

Madhumathi-> Wonder how I end up missing answering you. :D. Indeed it is... have you sorted out the conundrum and settled on a house? All the very best!

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