Om Shanti Om

Note: Spoilers ahead.

All I knew when we were going to go see OSO was that it was something to do with the 70s, that Deepika Padukone was supposed to be very very goodlooking and SRK had a new six-pack. All of these ideas were garnered through promos of the songs in SS's house. That was before SS was kind enough to tell me that the story involved reincarnation. Not that I expected anything from the movie, but when I heard the theme, I completely threw away every iota of expectation and logic in my head.

We underestimated the popularity of a SRK/Farah Khan/Bollywood movie and arrived fashionably late at 7:03 pm for a 7:00 show. Not bad, we told ourselves. That was before we stepped into the tiny theatre. It was packed and the noisy desi crowd was laughing, crunching popcorn and talking over the promos of many more movies to come. We waded our way all the way to the front, some 7 rows from the screen and looked up at the massive screen. At first, it took some getting used to... By the time my eyes scanned the length from the left of the screen to the right, the scene had changed. It was funny really. Us girls had subconsciously decided to throw the brains away and have a blast.

And a blast, we did have... The first half was amazingly funny and after Main Hoon Na and now Om Shanti Om, I can safely say that I like Farah Khan's style in direction. She is not afraid to make SRK look stupid and dress him up in red leather, in his skin or even the ridiculous wigs in the movie. And everything is soo obviously melodramatic and overexaggerated that the audience is left in peals of laughter. There is absolutely no logic as suspected and the spoofs of Manoj Kumar, Dharmendra, etc were also very entertaining. While SRK plays the comic relief with his sidekick, Iqbal fame - Shreyas Talpade, Deepika Padukone impresses with her elegant 70s do. She looks very refreshing and as the movie progressed, my opinion of her from "Ok what's so great about her" changed to "Wow.. she is very goodlooking". And not just that. She can act too! My favorite sequence in the first half is when SRK spoofs I am assuming Rajnikant in a flying-shooting-tiger fighting sequence with his funny "Enna rascala" and "Mind it.. Never mind it and Find it". It was hilarious and I was roaring so much that I had tears from laughing. Haha.

By the end of the first half, tragedy of unrequited love on either side and the heinous plans of the appreciable villainous producer played by Arjun Rampal have surfaced. And the intermission comes in when both lead characters die. And then comes the story of the reincarnation, past memories and what not. Completely unbelievable, unexpressibly tacky and way corny, the second half seems to drag a bit with a bhooth sentiment woven in the fabric. But the drag is lulled a bit by the appearance of the "star song" where all of Bollywood makes an appearance. I also especially liked the teeny cameos by Akshay and Abhishek. Conspicuous in her absence was Aishwarya. Frankly though, I have tired of seeing Rani/Kajol/Preity make an appearance in all these songs. As for SRK's six-pack, I must say that the man looks fabulous neck-down for his age. His face gives him away. The lack of proportionate arm muscle makes his body look too taut on his frame and not as natural as it is on say, Hrithik (sigh).

All in all, the movie is a complete entertainer, completely predictable, totally laughable and a sure watch if you don't have much to do. Its a certain time-pass and from what I have seen of some recent movies, (LCMD or Darling for example), a sure sound choice. I particularly liked SRK's goofiness (It was such a relief not to see him weep because of some idiotic ultrasentimental love story), the date song sequence and both the Om Shanti Om songs... Music's catchy if not phenomenal. To bolo Ommm Shanti Ommmmm.

KBC 3 with SRK

I had the (mis) fortune of catching the show online. And as usual, my sharp tongue represented by my quick fingers have some smart comments to make. The show was overall not really entertaining. SRK clearly lacks the presence that the Big B commanded. And it seems that he is totally following on his footsteps which sort of makes you think that SRK is Big B's shell without the brain... the latter takes the decisions and paths that they both will follow at different times.

SRK is also lesser intimidating than the Big B. It wouldnt be too comical if the Big B made the kind of seedy, "I'm-not-so-big-a-star" jokes a la SRK. And the "Computerji lock kiya jaye" has also undergone a facedrop. Its now localized to the origin of the participant and ranges from "Computer Da freeze kiya jaye" or "Compaq Da freeze kiya jaye" (label-wise advertisement harvest) for a Bengali to "Computer Garu" - "Compaq Garu" for a Telugu-ite. It was hilarious to hear SRK speak Telmil (the new fashioned Telugu-Tamil hybrid) - "Ye mandi jaragandi...Saapadriya.. Rendu plate idli".

The show seems to have been cut in size and increased in frequency with as many ad breaks as ever. It also drove me nuts that SRK was trying too hard to be pally-pally with the contestants and gave them everything from high-fives to hugs. He also egged them on to the right decisions helping them win the questions and in one case quit with enough money to ward any guilt off. All said and done, it is not entirely fair for me to surmise about SRK in just one episode. It is to be seen if he retains any charisma that was once associated with the show at all.. We'll wait n watch!

Don -- A twist in the tale

Warning: There are spoilers ahead. In case you haven't seen the movie and intend seeing it, you shouldn't read further.

Ah.. Here I am.. back with a movie review... late again... but nevertheless... I probably can't sleep if I don't put my thoughts on my blog! It was another SRK movie and it took most of my will-power to convince myself I wanted to see this movie. And I am going to be honest and accept here that I voted to see this movie this past weekend amongst the few other lousy choices I had. I must mention here for the benefit of the non-existant few that this is a remake of the 1978 Amitabh starrer cum cult hit movie. Many songs are reproduced and given a, I want to say fresh whiff, but I'm afraid I don't lie

So, amongst us we had V who'd seen the movie, raved a bit about it and was going to keep us informed about it should we miss a few golden moments. And the movie starts in a cafe in Paris where SRK is using a RAZR and just utters "Don" into the mouthpiece. While it zooms out on his face, the first thing you notice is that he's aged. He really has. At 42, he looks every day of it, lines on his face and everything. Plus, they've given him this hideous hairpiece - a chinese wig as we all christened it (the hair was too shiny n sleek n silky to be Indian). And for most part, I couldn't keep my eyes off the reflection from the hair.

One of the first things you tend to notice is that the movie is slick. The cinematography rocking. The sets good. Locations foreign. Modern gadgets, et al. No waste of time. It cuts scene by scene very swiftly and doesn't drag the wee bit that its predecessor did. Comes the song, "Ye mera dil..", the Helen seducer number, you are shocked by how incredulously out of place Kareena Kapoor looks. Not only is she an average dancer compared to the smoking siren Helen was, you are certain to feel that she is suffering to catch up with the pace of the song and unless a man were thoroughly desparate, he would hardly wanna be in the same room as her, let alone be seduced. In contrast, Priyanka Chopra wasnt so bad a replacement for Zeenat. But she could've been better. Boman Irani who plays the inspector is his good self and Om Puri's involvement seems abbreviated. Arjun Rampal has done a decent job. And obviously poor SRK has done his bit to emulate the master (in the villainous part, I must accept he is good. But the other part makes up for this good perfomance - a total fiasco

When the simpleton SRK is introduced is the moment of truth that SRK was good for all the anti-hero roles he's done. His two roles in this movie contrast so much you can make the stark difference. As a villain, he is slick, and importantly believably wicked. Whereas as the innocent guy, a Bhaiya at that, he comes across as plain and artificial, especially because his dialect undergoes rapid changes from "humra" to "humara" and "ka" to "kya". Its distinct and is a big hole in the whole plot.

The biggest credit for the movie must go to the story tellers and the cinematographer who have certainly used the mold of the old movie to fashion something new. A big word of praise must go to the guys who thought up the theme of the original Don. To think such a complicated theme at a time of limited resources and making a blockbuster of it is something. This movie is smooth, sleek and slick. It moves rapidly and you hardly realize you have gotten yourself into a 2 hr 47 min commitment.

There's a big twist in the tale. In this one, the Don kills the simpleton way at the beginning and misleads everyone to think he is the simpleton posing as the Don to get all the benefits of the innocent man. This is tastefully revealed in the last scene and though there've been hints thrown all along, its only at that scene that one tends to pick the fragments and piece the puzzle together. And that literally spread this warmth inside of me that instantly endeared the movie to me.

And for this, Don to me, is a good movie. Definitely worth a watch -- Go for it.

Its definitely "Goodbye" to KANK

Disclaimer - Views about the movie are strictly mine and I if you don't agree with them, you and I should probably never meet again!

Scene: An optimistic gang of 9 @ Northway Theatres, Pittsburgh
Time: 6:05pm - almost just in time for the show
Movie: Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna - Karan Johar's latest

Ofcourse I had decided to keep my expectations @ rock bottom.. Another SRK-Karan Johar flick.. overreaction was expected aplenty and I wasn't disappointed from Scene 1. SRK as a soccer player wouldn't sell even in ethereal world... And with Jersey No. 7 and a tattoo screaming 'Victory', a certain ex-Man-U and current Real Madrid star would probably commit suicide if he saw who was impersonating him! (Well if that was too cryptic for all of you.. Its Becky darling) Whoosh! And then comes another unbelievable scene... Rani Mukerji in full bridal attire sitting unaccompanied on a remote garden bench while her wedding vows need to be taken in like 5 seconds. And who should come by her, but the soccer star SRK! And though he's married and she almost is, there's a lot of chemistry between them and guess who gives her the boost to overcome her doubts about her darling husband-to-be, Abhishek, but a total stranger - SRK?

Then comes an accident and soccer superstar becomes a bitter brooding wretch who is too much of a man to be able to take his wife's success in his stride. The typical inferiority complex sets in. Atleast ere theres some reason for discomfort. The other pair is unbelievable... A doting, dashing, darling hubby in Abhishek, admittedly a little childish, endearingly so, adores his wifee, Rani and she is a mass of stone... Untouched by his affections, saddened by her good fate and uninvolved in her marital life. (Doesnt make any sense!) And so, the two bitter souls through quirks of fate are thrown together and as they work at fixing their own marriages, they end up setting themselves up. How that is "love" is once again beyond me.. And guilt brings in treats for the respective spouses who are naive enough to believe that the bad patch in their marriage is finally over and that everything is all good and fun. While Preity and Abhishek are out celebrating the success of their marriage (without their spouses - WHY would they do that?), this unlikely bitter couple in love sleep together.

Woven through all this is an ungainly role for Amitabh - a womanizing Papa.. Who celebrates his late wife by being with every 20-something he can set his eyes on... And only because its Amitabh, you can probably take it without flinching. Aby baby is Abhi's dad and Kiron "the gorgeous" Kher is SRK's mom and their flirting is unbearable. This couple chances upon Rani n SRK cootchie-cooing. And that signals the end of the stupid affair when they decide to come clean with their spouses. Neither Preity nor Abhishek can take it. While Preity implodes, Abhishek explodes and they both get rid of their spouses. Rani and SRK dont admit that they are now free to see each other and instead live a life of misery for 3 years assuming that the other is happy. BS!!! I wont go into the details.. but then they do get together in the end (And dont feel sad for Preity or Abhishek.. they've moved on too.. with different people).

A long, and painstaking account and I had to relive the torture! The first half hour is quite funny with good comic timing... the rest of it is a total pain in the ass and completely unbelievable. The movie is based on an english counterpart, "Closer" starring Jude Law, Natalie Portman, Julia Roberts and Clive Owen. Though I havent seen it, ofcourse I can vouch for the fact that it will probably be a trillion times better. SRK has overreacted beyond imagination and the way he cries makes you want to pull you arm out of your sleeve and play with it so you have something to do! (Courtesy: Joey in F-R-I-E-N-D-S on Janice's laughter!) Except for Mitwaa, even Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy failed to impress... The songs have an uncanny resemblence to te 'Kal Ho Na Ho' numbers which were better by far...

All in all.. even if someone paid you, its not worth the watch... BEWARE!